The virtuous woman: could you be one?

Near the end of the famous Virtuous Woman passage, we read: Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all (Proverbs 31:29). To be sure, the woman in Proverbs has me beat on many counts. I mean, when’s the last time I bought land and planted a vineyard, made my own clothes out of tapestry, or wove fine linen belts to sell? I’m afraid the answer is never.

But, I have done my best to make sure my family is adequately clothed and fed. I believe my husband safely trusts me. I try to do him good and not evil every day. I don’t work out as I should, but I have strong arms and can do what I need to. I even actively care for the poor. I strive to watch my mouth and say kind, helpful words.

Many daughters have done virtuously. Could this include me?

Oh, and the maidens part. Today, maybe it means we take good care of our dishwashers, clothes washers, dryers, and electronic kitchen gadgets, etc. I don’t know. But, maybe we’re caring for our helpers when keep those things clean and in good working order. What do you think?

The Virtuous Woman isn’t idle, and she is an example to her children. Her husband praises her.

Can this be us?

I think so.

I’ve heard this passage expounded by many people, each with a different view of this lady. Some say that she is an example for everyone, which is true. Some say she’s probably the composite ideal woman, which is probably true, as well. Others proclaim that no one woman could possibly add up to her. Well, maybe so, but she did have help to accomplish all these things. She supervised her household, and I can see that she—like a business owner today—might be able to accomplish all of it with a troop of helpers.

Can I be a virtuous woman? Yes, I think so.

Can you? Of course.

When we boil down Proverbs 31:10-31, the essence is that a virtuous woman cares for her household. She makes her husband, children, and home a priority. She works hard so that they’re provided for.

And, she loves God. Period.

Maybe the lady of Proverbs 31 truly excels them all—and outdoes the rest of us. But, maybe we qualify as some of the many daughters who have done virtuously. I hope so.

I love the end of this chapter. Such truth: Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised (verse 30).

The next verse speaks of the rewards of a woman who works hard: Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates (31). Remember, her husband is the city leader at the gate. He benefits from her care and hard work.

Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies (verse 10). A perfect ruby is worth more than a diamond the same weight. This lady is worth much more than rubies.

I want to be a virtuous woman.

How about you?

Do you think she’s achievable? I do.

What are your thoughts? Please share.

Do you like yourself?

Many women don’t like themselves. Maybe they look in the mirror and scowl, but for the majority, it goes much deeper. They simply don’t like who they are … and they don’t know how to be what they want to be.

What’s the problem? It could be many things, for example:

  • Emotions—Ups and downs, the rollercoaster of women’s lives
  • Health issues—Underlying health problems and/or pain can greatly affect how we feel about ourselves.
  • Comparison—Social media shows one side of people’s lives, but women still tend to believe what they see—and want it.
  • A lack of biblical perspective—An accurate look at Scripture will help us improve and accept ourselves today. It will also give us goals and purpose.
  • Lack of contentment—Contentment helps us be happy with ourselves as well as what we have.
  • Unachievable goals—Many women set their goals as if they were someone else. They think they have to achieve something great in order to succeed.

Let’s look at the Bible to see who you are and what you need to strive for.

  1. You are an amazing creation. God planned you from the very beginning, when you were in the womb. For thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. My substance was not hid from thee, when I was made in secret, and curiously wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Thine eyes did see my substance, yet being unperfect; and in thy book all my members were written, which in continuance were fashioned, when as yet there was none of them (Psalm 139:13-16). Therefore, since God made you wonderful and marvellous in His divine plan, you can praise Him for exactly how you are.
  2. To God, you were worth saving. It was because of Jesus’ payment for sins and not because of any merits on your part. Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to his mercy he saved us, by the washing of regeneration, and renewing of the Holy Ghost (Titus 3:5). For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life (John 3:16). I don’t think I will ever fully comprehend how a holy God could love sinners—but He does. Praise Him!
  3. God cares about every little detail of your life. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered (Matthew 10:30). How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! how great is the sum of them! If I should count them, they are more in number than the sand: when I awake, I am still with thee (Psalm 139:17-18). Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you (1 Peter 5:7).
  4. The Lord promises to meet your needs—all of them. But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:19).
  5. If you trust Him, He will also be your guide. Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths (Proverbs 3:5-6). Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass (Psalm 37:5).
  6. Contentment can be learned. The Apostle Paul said, Not that I speak in respect of want (lack): for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content (Philippians 4:11). He goes on to say we should be content with what we have right now. Let your conversation (lifestyle) be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee (Hebrews 13:5).
  7. Understand that God loves to use weak things, and be thankful He wants to use you. For ye see your calling, brethren, how that not many wise men after the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble, are called: But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty; And base things of the world, and things which are despised, hath God chosen, yea, and things which are not, to bring to nought things that are: That no flesh should glory in his presence. But of him are ye in Christ Jesus, who of God is made unto us wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption: That, according as it is written, He that glorieth, let him glory in the Lord (1 Corinthians 1:26-31).
  8. Set a simple goal: to bring glory to God. Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God (1 Corinthians 10:31).

Love God, and accept yourself as a masterpiece of divine artwork, created for His glory.

God bless you today!

Is it always right to be kind?

My children know this verse backwards and forwards and in my own Mommy Version, which goes like this: And be ye kind one to your brother/sister/ mother/father (as needed) tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you (Ephesians 4:32, this mother’s version).

It’s a command. Be kind.

But, do we have to be kind to everybody? All the time?

Kindness is one of God’s attributes. Look at these verses:

  • And Naomi said unto her daughter in law, Blessed be he of the LORD, who hath not left off his kindness to the living and to the dead (Ruth 2:20a).
  • For his merciful kindness is great toward us: and the truth of the LORD endureth for ever. Praise ye the LORD (Psalm 117:2).
  • Jesus said, But love ye your enemies, and do good, and lend, hoping for nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil (Luke 6:35).
  • And rend your heart, and not your garments, and turn unto the LORD your God: for he is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repenteth him of the evil (Joel 2:13).
  • But in all things approving ourselves as the ministers of God, in much patience, in afflictions, in necessities, in distresses … By pureness, by knowledge, by longsuffering, by kindness, by the Holy Ghost, by love unfeigned (2 Corinthians 6:4, 6)
  • That in the ages to come he might shew the exceeding riches of his grace in his kindness toward us through Christ Jesus (Ephesians 2:7).

Through these verses, we learn that God is kind to everyone, even lousy humans who aren’t thankful, even evil. God’s essence demands His kindness.

One of the things God says about the Virtuous Woman is: She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness (Proverbs 31:26). How many of us use speech that is ruled by kindness?

Lets look at some more verses about what the Lord expects of Christians:

  • Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering (Colossians 3:12).
  • Add … to godliness brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness charity (from 2 Peter 1:5, 7).

Being kind obeys Scripture and sets Christians apart from the world.

Kindness doesn’t mean that a person cannot stand up for his rights. Remember Paul? The authorities, not knowing he was a Roman citizen by birth, treated him as a foreigner and tied him up to be scourged. And as they bound him with thongs, Paul said unto the centurion that stood by, Is it lawful for you to scourge a man that is a Roman, and uncondemned? (Acts 22:25, Complete story in Acts 22:22-29) Paul wasn’t being unkind; he was only claiming his rights as a Roman citizen.

Jesus cleansed the Temple with a little cord whip. You might think that wasn’t kind. Are we forgetting Who Jesus is? He is God. He knows everything. He is just and kind. Did He forget Himself and act in the flesh? Absolutely not! He is the only Person Who has the right to judge. He had made the rules about temple worship in the first place. Here’s the story: And they come to Jerusalem: and Jesus went into the temple, and began to cast out them that sold and bought in the temple, and overthrew the tables of the moneychangers, and the seats of them that sold doves; And would not suffer that any man should carry any vessel through the temple. And he taught, saying unto them, Is it not written, My house shall be called of all nations the house of prayer? but ye have made it a den of thieves (Mark 11:15-17).

In Matthew’s account, immediately after Jesus threw out the moneychangers, we read: And the blind and the lame came to him in the temple; and he healed them. And when the chief priests and scribes saw the wonderful things that he did…. (Matthew 21:14-15a). This doesn’t sound like Jesus was unkind, does it?

Indeed, in John’s gospel, the only one of the four gospels where the “whip” is mentioned, it says it was small and made of cords. Never does it say it was used on people or animals.

God is kind.

God wants us to be kind.

He’s kind to everyone—good and bad—and He wants us to be like Him.

And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you (Ephesians 4:32).

Choosing to walk in light

This world is the pits. It has been since the first sin in the Garden of Eden. But, God wants Christians—those who know Him personally—to walk in a different plane.

While it’s true that Christians are in the world, they don’t have to act like the world around them. Neither should they ignore everything around them, live in communes, and become out-of-touch weirdos.

We can walk in the light. How do I know? The Bible says it’s possible. First, it tells us where light comes from: God is light, and in him is no darkness at all (1 John 1:5b). After that, it tells us the results of walking in the light: But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin (1 John 1:7).

Of course, Christians aren’t sinless. We have battles within ourselves, and sometimes we even hurt others. Thankfully, the Lord gives us a remedy for sin: If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9). Go daily to Jesus for cleansing.

I love the fact that every Christian is already light. Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid (Matthew 5:14). It doesn’t say, “You can develop light” or “You might become light.” It says Ye are the light.

Recently, I attended a camp for young ladies. One of the young women said, “People tell me my mother has a light inside.” It’s true! She does.

What do we do with that light? Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven (Matthew 5:15-16).

Don’t hide it.

Hold it high.

Let it shine.

That ye may be blameless and harmless, the sons of God, without rebuke, in the midst of a crooked and perverse nation, among whom ye shine as lights in the world (Philippians 2:15).

Walking in the light means we’re living with God. Then spake Jesus again unto them, saying, I am the light of the world: he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life (John 8:12). I am the light of the world (John 9:5b).

Do you walk with Jesus? Is He the One who lights your path so that you can reflect His light to those around you?

One of the secrets of walking in light is rejecting darkness. Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world (1 John 2:15-16). It’s easy to read these words and feel self-righteous, but if we’re honest, we have to admit that sometimes we want things we see. Our flesh and our eyes draw us in to things we don’t need in our lives. We might even covet someone else’s stuff. Our love should be for God, first and foremost.

When we truly love Him, He supplies our needs.  Jesus said, Consider the lilies how they grow: they toil not, they spin not; and yet I say unto you, that Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. If then God so clothe the grass, which is to day in the field, and to morrow is cast into the oven; how much more will he clothe you, O ye of little faith? And seek not ye what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink, neither be ye of doubtful mind. For all these things do the nations of the world seek after: and your Father knoweth that ye have need of these things. But rather seek ye the kingdom of God; and all these things shall be added unto you (Luke 12:27-31).

We can confidently walk with God, knowing that He is with us—and He is so much greater than anything this world can offer. Ye are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world (1 John 4:4).

Choose to walk in light today.

“God won’t give you more than you can handle.” True?

“God won’t give you more than you can handle” is one of those typical sayings that we should file in the nearest trashcan.

Why? Because it’s not true.

If you’ve never been to the place you felt completely overwhelmed, then you haven’t lived very long—or you blissfully go through life oblivious. (If the latter is true, I envy you.)

Trials come. Many times, they arrive bunched together, all at once. Everyone experiences hurts, yucky situations, broken relationships, deaths, and financial tight spots. Everyone has the washing machine break down—on a day when company’s coming and you need clean sheets. Everyone cuts a finger, spills milk, and drops eggs or jelly on a freshly mopped floor. Everyone has car problems. Everyone has friend, family, and neighbor personality clashes. Almost everyone experiences sickness sooner or later. Nobody doesn’t have trials. No one’s immune. Trials are part of life.

I think it’s funny when people share trite sayings and sound bites that might seem right. They may even sound like Scripture–but those sayings aren’t true.

God won’t give you more than you can handle?

Ask the Apostle Paul about that. This is his testimony: Of the Jews five times received I forty stripes save one. Thrice was I beaten with rods, once was I stoned, thrice I suffered shipwreck, a night and a day I have been in the deep; In journeyings often, in perils of waters, in perils of robbers, in perils by mine own countrymen, in perils by the heathen, in perils in the city, in perils in the wilderness, in perils in the sea, in perils among false brethren; In weariness and painfulness, in watchings often, in hunger and thirst, in fastings often, in cold and nakedness. Beside those things that are without, that which cometh upon me daily, the care of all the churches. Who is weak, and I am not weak? who is offended, and I burn not? (2 Corinthians 11:24-29) Falsely accused, narrowly escaping death, persecuted in churches he founded, personal disappointments, prison time, and the weight of the ministry upon him—the Apostle Paul understood there’s suffering in the will of God.

The Bible is clear: Yea, and all that will live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution (2 Timothy 3:12). Christians should expect it. No, we don’t need to fear or do something dumb in order to invite it, but those who live a godly life will see persecution at some time and in some way.

I love Paul’s response to his list of sufferings: If I must needs glory, I will glory of the things which concern mine infirmities. The God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, which is blessed for evermore, knoweth that I lie not (2 Corinthians 30-31). He stated the facts, accepted them, and glorified God in the process.

Will God sometimes allow—not necessarily give—you more than you can handle?

Oh yes!

An Old Testament example is Job. God introduces him: my servant Job, that there is none like him in the earth, a perfect and an upright man, one that feareth God, and escheweth evil (from Job 1:8).

Yet, God allowed him in one day to lose his herds, servants, and all ten of his children. His reaction is perfect: Then Job arose, and rent his mantle, and shaved his head, and fell down upon the ground, and worshipped, And said, Naked came I out of my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return thither: the LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD. In all this Job sinned not, nor charged God foolishly (Job 1:20-22).

Later, Job also lost his health, the support of his wife, and any encouragement his friends might have offered. His loss was overwhelming, so much so that he even wished he’d never been born.

After Job persevered, God blessed him. And, ever since, we speak of the “patience of Job” for his incredible endurance in the face of adversity.

I don’t pretend to understand the Trinity: three Persons—all one God. Remember when Jesus was praying in the garden of Gethsemane? Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done. And there appeared an angel unto him from heaven, strengthening him. And being in an agony he prayed more earnestly: and his sweat was as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground (Luke 22:42-44). Even Jesus—God in the flesh—needed Divine help as He faced the cross.

The truth is that sometimes, God allows trials that we can’t handle.

I believe this verse is taken out of context many times, but it is one of the most encouraging verses in the Bible within its context. Paul is talking about persecutions and afflictions that aren’t going away. He’s writing from prison, having suffered hunger, cold, and adversities. His testimony (given by the Holy Spirit): I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me (Philippians 4:13).

Job determined, Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him (Job 13:15a).

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son (Romans 8:28-29a). Everything we go through—with the Lord’s help—helps strengthen us in faith and actually works together for our good. Our experiences help us be more conformed into the image of Christ. These hardships build up our faith log: God helped me here and here; He will also help me go through future trials.

After Paul asked God three times to take away his thorn in the flesh, God gave him a clear answer. And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Paul’s response? Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me (2 Corinthians 12:9).

God’s grace is sufficient, but we are, at best, weak human beings. My own life verse was chosen back in high school. I thought life was daunting then, but again and again since, the Lord has proved Himself powerful. Faithful is he that calleth you, who also will do it (1 Thessalonians 5:24).

It’s freeing to know that we don’t have to be enough. He is.

We don’t have to handle it. He can.

We can completely rely on our all-powerful, compassionate God, Who can do it for us.

God bless you, today.